My old pal from school is one of the greatest dating geniuses known to mankind. He often tells me that Dating is like doing a business. It can get boring, embarrassing and outright humiliating but you have to make sure you always follow your client's ass. You have to convince your client that whatever you are selling is suiting the needs and is a value for his money. He preached following all the marketing principles we use doing a business including maintaining a profit loss account. He however warned to not to do it as a job else it will take us to our doom. I never took him seriously till he got ditched by his latest sweetheart and had to take therapy lessons from a psychologist. Once I casually told him that all his principles of carrying out this dating game is bull and he should now start taking relationships seriously. I was shocked to hear that he was just taking the therapy to make his girlfriend guilty and thus giving himself an outside chance of getting her back.
It was during that point I met this great girl who seems to be the angel from the other world. She was a social worker, a musician and a corporate consultant. I met her through a common friend and we hit it right from the word go. We had common taste in movies, music, books and life in general. She was peppy and cheerful all the time. It seemed I was blessed. We use to go out very often and all went great for about 2 months and after that things suddenly start changing when she required me to change some of my habits and wanted me to be more like someone she wanted me to become. I was ok as I am all for adjustments in relationships but I forgot my friends greatest warning to never date like a job. The more I change the more I was expected to and I start feeling as if I am being transformed to someone completely different.
It became apparent that I will have to talk to her about her expectations and my existence in general. I called her for an evening walk after office to talk about it. Initially she was really angry hearing my complaints but later during the conversation confessed that she has been hard on me as she wanted me to be like her past boyfriend. She told me that the relationship is important to her but she will always expect me to be like him.
I felt used in every possible sense but I was able to maintain my composure and had to walk away. I didn't know what to say to her. She called the next day and we are good friends now but it was a lesson learnt hard and made me careful both with my clients and with my dates.
Comments
I had some friends who were geniuses at handling girls. One of them used to say something I always remember:
"Oh.. I got to make this girl my girl-friend"
I said why.
"I never had a girl-friend whose name starts with Z"
That made me laugh many times but it was truth, he had lots of girl-friends and he had consumed all 26 letters of English.
your post reminded me of him. I learned many techniques of dating from them. It was some sort of craze that every boy has in his early youth - to have a GF and kiss her passionately and after some years, after the age of 23, if he gets enlightened by some truths of life then he looses such dating-interests. Unfortunately, I have lost 100% of this interest. I am enlightened to master my profession, to master 2 different fields in life. Fortunately, many boys don't loose this dating-interest and some who lost it regain it in later years. I am not of that kind, I just want to think differently than others.
Anyway, I enjoyed your post, just wished it could be a little longer. I am sure you will never loose this interest, you will keep it with different phases of your life, including marriage ;)