After being cheated..

World does not work the way it seems. Either I have an underdeveloped processing system to process information or people in general are so complex that it’s almost impossible to correctly identify the real self of people around you. People are seem to be hidden under this web of lies, and somehow are afraid of revealing their true self. Well its not that I am against anyone decision to hide their personal secrets but deceiving someone with false facts and promises is certainly cruel. Its not that I have met only pathological cheaters but on the contrary people I know are frank and brave about themselves. I guess that the reason when I met people so very different it is difficult for me not to believe in them.

I am not very proud of my social intelligence so I never feel bad when people generally turned out to be different than I expect them to be but it hurts when you feel manipulated for some petty gains. It deletes your faith in humanity and you feel revengeful which ultimately harm you more than the deceit itself. When the reality actually dawns on you it leads to varied response depending on how close the person is to you and in my case the persons. I think these problems come in pairs and I had to face two of them. They are completely separate people unknown to each other except me being their common victim.

Anyway I guess I am just crying too much. People do different things under different circumstances. Life is not fair to everybody and those who have suffered in the past may find it easy to do this to people. There may be some explanation to everything people do. Life put people under difficult situations and it easy to break under some of them. Lies may be sometimes necessary and I don't want to argue on that but writing this blog was to ask myself what should I take home from this? What are my lessons? I think I have my answer now..

I will never be able to control what others do to me its their discretion what I can do is to control my actions and the best way to do it to be honest about myself to others. Whether others do good or bad is just immaterial… not worth my effort or energy...